
"What the hell!"

"Journalism is clearly not a crime."

"Sleepy Don."

How's everybody doing tonight?

"Biden laughed."

"Room just froze faster than Mitch McConnell."

"He's gotta be on our side."

"Jimmy Carter is out there thinking..."

"I thought I saw Matt Gaetz here tonight..."

Courtroom sketch artist

"Too chilling for you guys?"

He got a bipartisan infrastructure bill passed.

"You think you're better than me?"

The final White House Correspondents' Dinner

"If you're watching C-SPAN on a Saturday night..."

"Sleepy Joe is still awake!"

Criminal masterminds who bike to get ice cream

"You remember."

"We're all here tonight at nerd prom."

"I got one 'woo.'"

"I'm also used to being second gentleman."

"And the race is tied?"

"Your words speak truth to power."

"Wordle is here tonight."

"Can we just acknowledge..."